There is certainly alot of contention.
Black Lives Matter is another topic that people can't seem to agree on. Some people want to defund the police and some people support the police. There have been riots, protests and looting and not a thing has changed. We thought that there was progress but just this last week we had another George Floyd incident. A black family in a white minivan were all taken out of their car, put against the concrete floor and held at gunpoint, children included. Will anything ever change? How can we take the racism out of a group that was made to enforce segregation. It's all just frustrating.
I have felt so much anxiety being online these last months. I had to take a week off after black lives matter. People felt SO strongly about what happened to George Floyd. It was affecting my mental health. I wanted to be involved, I wanted to be educated, I wanted to be part of the movement but I think somewhere along the lines, the intention was lost and people started looting just for pure evil. People were threatening businesses, who had already been affected by COVID, to take a stand publicly against racism or else they would boycott their business. It was just all too much. I read as much as I could. I tried to encourage people to take a stand in whatever way they felt comfortable. I shared articles I found interesting and powerful. And then I had to leave. I couldn't take it anymore.
This past week was The World Against Human Trafficking week. That was a rough week. It was hard to watch videos and read reports about the amount of children being trafficked in today's world. Reading about conspiracy theories on how Hollywood is all involved in the thousands of children who go missing every day. Hollywood stars that have gone to Epstein's island and are still walking around as if nothing has ever happened. I watched hard documentaries. I cried listening to stories of girls who were victims of abuse by their own family members. I learned about the lack of reporting that goes on with sexual abusers. Apparently if you have abused a child, you don't have to register as a sex offender unless you are a level 3 sex offender.
I took time to listen and learn for my kid's sake. It was hard but important. I don't want to be naive to the world's evils. The more I know the better I can protect my kids.
I don't really mind the quarantine life. Last week was rough. It was like all of a sudden my kids decided they were done being home and just fought straight for an entire week. I was tired and anxious which didn't make for a patient mom. But this week we got a fresh start. I am excited for the school to start again so that we can all have a fresh start. I just learned today that Lilah will be starting school virtually. That should be interesting. I was hoping she could actually go to school since her classroom size is small and she is in school for speech delay. But I guess we'll make the best of it.
This week I've been a great mom. I've done activities, played with them, took them to a friend's house for a play date and even made a water table for them.
Today Lilah took the clothes out of the dryer all by herself and started putting them away.
I took a nap with David and when I woke up she had opened a box of popsicles and was starting on her second one.
While I was getting ready, she was flipping through pictures of my phone and came across a picture of David crying. Lilah said "baby" and her eyes started to swell with tears. She saw that her baby brother was sad and she got sad too.
Today David helped clean up and even picked up trash from the floor and put it in the trash without me asking (sometimes he puts more in the trash than I want him to but today it was actually helpful)
Days like this just fill my mom cup. To find them sitting together watching a show and sharing a treat. Nothing makes me happier than seeing my kids play together and love each other. Nothing.
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