Black Lives Matter

Wow, this week was so heavy. Usually when I am overwhelmed as a mommy I can look to social media for someone to post something funny or a fun recipe to recipe to try. Not this week. A lot of heavy thought provoking things were shared. People have strong emotions with regards to black lives matter. I tried to soak it all in. Understand people's different perspectives. I learned that saying All Lives Matter Vs Black Lives Matter was not the right thing to do because when people say "My son died" You don't respond well everyone's son is important. You instead focus on the person that is hurting. When Jesus left the 99 sheep to go find the 1 that was lost, it did not mean that the other ones didn't matter. It just meant that the 1 was in danger and needed help. I also learned that saying "I want my kids to grow up being color blind" is not the right thing to do. Instead we should say, "Look at her black skin and curly hair, isn't it beautiful.

I've also seen many videos involving police brutality. There have been many ideas regarding what should be the solution to stop this and people have been sharing how police only go through 4 months of intensive training and then they get their guns. An article circled around stating that a chef requires 8 months of training to learn how to cook food for others so why do police only get 4 months of training before being given lethal weapons.

I've understood the looting and why people are so angry. I heard a black girl give her thoughts about black people not owning anything. They don't feel accepted in the community. When they behave they are still stopped for suspicion of...having black skin. So then why would they care about burning things down when cops are constantly shooting and killing them. I understood their anger and their frustration towards a system that has been constantly suppressing and failing them.

This week was heavy. I tried to take it all in before it took a toll on me. I could only handle it for a day or 2 before having to take a break from my phone. It was too much all at once. But I still wanted to learn. I wanted to be part of the change. I read somewhere that if you went back in time and were alive during the Holocaust, the same thing you would do to stop it would be what you are doing right now.

I feel like their is nothing tangible that I can do to change things right now and that is frustrating. But I know that I can make the biggest change of all with my kids. Their generation will not grow up being hostile to those that have opened their hearts to change these past weeks.

I also made a mistake this past week. I did not agree with someone's statement on the internet and made it known how it felt. We had a heated exchange back and forth with resulted in nothing except bad feelings. I will never be doing that again.

I look forward to this new week. These past couple of weeks have been so weird, crazy, and life changing. I'm glad I am doing all of the learning for my kids because growth is uncomfortable. Hope my babies grow up to not only see people in a kinder way but have the courage to stand up for what is right.

Looting and Rioting

I haven't watched the news. Honestly, I have enough negativity coming in through social media. Not really negativity but more like so much sadness about how we have gotten nowhere over the past 100 years with racism. I think it's because alot of us are frustrated that something like this would happen in 2020. I was thinking about the girl who recorded the video of Floyd being murdered and thought of the backlash she must be getting for not stepping in to help. People were criticizing her for not calling for help, but who was she supposed to call? The police? Every time someone would try to step in and help, they would be threatened with pepper spray and could've also lost their life.

I have also thought about peaceful protests. There's people doing silent protests, but I don't think people can hear them. I understand now the need to riot. People say, why don't you just peacefully protest, but when they do, they do it wrong. I guess there's no right way to protest. That's why it is a protest. I see that the rioting comes from years of abuse, racism, and watching your family members innocently be charged harshly for crimes that they did not commit. They live in fear that their brother or son or husband "fits the description" and is taken into custody. 

I have learned to listen to understand and not just listen to respond. 

So many emotions these couple of days from everyone. Everyone's heart is heavy. Yet how do we make a change in this world? You can't change the minds of people. I guess all we can do is teach within the walls of our home how to love on another and how to stand up and protect our black brothers and sisters. It is no longer okay to be silently non racist but now it's the time to be publicly anti-racist. I have heard so many quotes from people that have caused me to seriously reflect how I really feel about racism. 

This year has been a year of much reflection. With Corona virus, I have learned to be grateful for my health, my job, and having all of my needs and wants met. With the death of George, I have learned to be grateful for being able to learn about racism through books and not through life experiences. 

My kids are lucky that they have no idea how crazy the world is right now. The news is full of people rioting and looting stores and burning buildings and cars. I'm glad that we are safe within the walls of our home. I'm grateful my kids have no idea how dangerous it is to be outside right now. I am grateful that I get to experience this for them and that they don't have to go through this and feel these emotions first hand.